Daily Archives: April 10, 2011

Conversations with a Chair


Charity brought up the idea that our seats in mythology class may not like us. In the spirit of that, I came up with how the chair would react if, a, it liked me and, b, if it did not:

A: (from the chair’s perspective)

Yay! It’s almost 11 – she’ll be here soon to cover my cold back with her coat before she sets that smooth notebook on the desk – I wonder what color of pen she’ll use today. It’s so nice when  she settles in to listen and learn – I feel like my job is accomplished. I hope she isn’t tired though – she tends to be less active then. And I’ve got this awful itch on the side of the desk – hopefully she’ll scratch it absent-mindedly or something…

B: (again from the chair)

Oh no, here it comes again. Her and her coat and hair smothering me in this hot classroom. I mean really – she can’t put her hair up further or set her coat on the floor? Or her bony seat sitting on me – so uncomfortable. Maybe if I just pull the chair next to me closer she’ll feel crammed and sit somewhere else… Or maybe I’ll position myself at an awkward angle or something. She thinks she can just walk – well, sit and write – all over me. And I’m though with it!

Inanimate Objects with Names


There are names for literally everything in the Edda. EVERYTHING. It took me awhile to get used to it before I realized that I name most everything too. Maybe it’s just Norwegian genes, but my computer, calculator, phone, iPod, desk chair, alarm clock, guitar, tiger lily plant, amp, favorite guitar pick, tuner, printer, art set, microwave, TV, PS2, refrigerator, stool, suitcase, camera and even my hair… Yes, I know, a bit strange. I probably got it from my mom – who consistently sings songs she makes up about our pets, the computer, cooking, or just really anything. I seem to have inherited this tendency. Perhaps a bit strange, but honestly, most of the inanimate objects I’ve named I’m around much more often and are much more useful than most of the people I know… Sorry. But it is kind of true…